Tag Archives: Musings On Other

Molly, Stewie, Me: Times Three

6 Jun
A/N:  Images displayed on this birthday post are not mine–Thank Goddess for Tumblr, Imagebam & Pinterest. No copyright infringement intended. Click the image to link directly to its origins. Musical inspirations listed at the bottom of post. To open the playlist in a new window, click here—> http://pl.st/p/20984139787  Posts are usually pre-read by a luminous team of Rebel Beauties, but tonight: It’s just me. These garbled ramblings in all their flaws and glories are mine, all mine.

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Definition: Beautiful

~Merriam-Webster Dictionary, June 2010

Beautiful, adjective. Exciting sensuous or aesthetic pleasure. Applies to whatever excites the keenest of pleasure to the senses and stirs emotion.

This was the exact definition which launched the very first Musings three years ago, on Thursday, June 3, 2010. As I’m typing these words out tonight, on a Thursday evening in June of 2013, tears are paving tracks down my cheeks. Moving through the actual movements of piecing together the musical playlist, and selecting images to use for this essay provokes profound physical reactions from me, clearly. I should have seen it coming. It is without exaggeration and with complete awe that I realize everything I do these days is in response to, influenced by, or connected with the decision I made to muse aloud about Unconventional Beauty. It manifests in the music in my library, the people I speak with, and in the conscientious practice of self and Other compassion. To say that these days, I’m experiencing the ‘keenest of pleasure to the senses’: Accurate.

Molly and Me

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Did it start with Molly Ringwald?  When I found myself at Borders Books (Rest in Peace), I hadn’t expected the Original Poster Girl for Awkward, Outsider Beauty to be there too. I was brand new to Twitter, and operating under my now-unused personal account KJN52. One of my very first tweets looked something like:

@kjn52 Molly Ringwald is here and I want to scream about Jake Ryan and that people’s “little brothers paid a buck to see your underwear!”

Obscure Sixteen Candles reference, my friends. If you haven’t seen John Hughes’ masterpiece about misfits and adolescent longing, then I have the opinion that you are suffering from staggering incompleteness. Please. Go. I sat at a cafe table  in the corner of the book store and watched as Ms Ringwald read excerpts from her new book Getting The Pretty Back to a captive audience. While I wasn’t originally there for the book promotion, I could hang onto every word falling from Molly’s mouth from my perch at the edge of my chair. So Molly Ringwald was speaking about great things, important things. About how we can lose our sense of self, especially when surrounded by people and forces willing to take it for themselves, turn it into something else entirely.  Says Molly: It’s up to us to define our paths. Foreshadowing the Other Anthology, Ms Ringwald? Prettiness, she reminds us, is a state of mind. 

“…It’s the part of you that knows what you really want, that takes risks.” 

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Molly Ringwald did not know this at the time, but she in that moment, became my very first Featured Rebel Royal for what would become a ‘blog’, then an entity, and then a practice that would alter my life. 

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Of course, it was another Molly, my dear friend Molly, who could also be credited for sparking the Other Revolution. It was she,  after all, who pulled me out of my house to the book store with her to pick up the sequel in a series she was not exactly forthcoming about. Molly: hipster, cool, brilliant… huddled next to the store’s display table, raptly staring at….

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I watched, baffled, as Usually Poised Molly, slunk around the table, and snatched up a copy of a sleek, black book with the word moon across it’s spine.

“What are you doing, Molls?” I asked.

“I haven’t slept for over a day. I couldn’t put this damn book down. I must read more. MORE!” Molly gushed, her eyes darting around her.

Ok, my usually collected reserved girlfriend was literally trembling [withdrawals?], and so I grabbed the first book of the series, and promptly marched up to the counter to plunk down my money. I was scheduled for knee surgery a few days later. I was gonna need lots of entertainment for the weeks I was to be bed-ridden in recovery. Vampires? No problem. I have a long love affair with stories of the supernatural variety [I am an OG Vampire Diaries reader, plus a Buffy the Vampire Slayer fan] and I simply had to experience the stories that transformed my friend into a shaking, stumbling Twilight fiend. 

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Suffice it to say: I didn’t sleep that night either. I really didn’t sleep the next four days. I sent my husband prowling the city at after hours book stores to pick up New Moon and Eclipse [Breaking Dawn hadn’t been published yet]  for me, since I was supposed to stay in bed. You know.. knee surgery blah blah blaaaah. So I stayed in bed… and read… and researched, and googled…and stumbled upon comment sections, YouTube euphorias, discussion groups and MTV: Twilight Tuesdays. 

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Seven months later, in November 2008, my friend Molly was my date on opening day to the movie: Twilight

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Goddess Bless the Mollies in my life.

An Awe-Inspiring Awful

I mentioned my weeks of post-surgery recovery in Spring of 2008. During that eight weeks in which I was off work and rehabilitating my knee, I discovered the Twilight books, I discovered the internet. Therefore, I discovered The Fandom. MTV’s Twilight Tuesdays sparked an intense fascination with the chemically combusting interactions between the absurdly aesthetic Kristen and Robert. I found fellow book readers who were excited about the release of the movie, who also noticed an unmistakable affection between the two lead actors cast to play Bella and Edward in the film. A hub  [at the time] of seemingly positive discussion about all things Twilight revealed itself as a forum through E!Online: The Awful Truth. Take heed, friends. I don’t mention that place or it’s creator/ Captain Shit-Stirrer Casablanca… ever. But in celebration of Musings On Others’ third anniversary, I would be remiss to neglect acknowledging its origins.

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See, The Awful Truth brought me to my CyberSisters & Readers five years ago. Among them my beloved Bouffant, Robkris13, gretel, and RainierSixPac. There are so many phenomenal women in my group–like the featured #Eeeby. Yes, the now defunct Awful introduced me to people whom are now some of my best friends. I speak with them every single day. They have held my hand in my most devastating moments, moments from which I am still recovering, that have occurred very recently. Friends I’ve made through this exasperating fandom represent intelligent, empowered, Creative Thinkers in the most awesome of ways.  Most importantly, I discovered Muses and Royal Rebels who encourage and inspire. Over three years ago, I met the incomparable CynicallyConvy, brilliant author of KSIBTU, and her unbelievable band of warrior beauties including the insanely talented Buff, JHiggs and my lion-hearted sister Just2CUSmile

KSIBTU Painting

By the beginning of 2009, I was pretty comfortable hanging with my CyberSisters (led by the trailblazing MarblePole) in our own discussion space, separate from Awful Truth, but still interacting online with delightful, articulate “regulars” who shared the same appreciation for Kristen Stewart, her ‘deliciously handsome’ partner in crime Robert Pattinson, and yes…Twilight. I flew under the radar for the most part. My decision to become involved, was as I noticed the alarmingly abominable attacks on Kristen Stewart in so many of those online forums. Especially baffling: those doling out the most vicious criticisms were people who did not even know Kristen. Bloggers, commenters, teenage girls home from school, their mothers with a bit of idle time–they, by far, unleashed the cruelest, most uninformed and illogical bouts of malevolence onto Ms Stewart, and I was struck speechless. I am usually anything but without words, guys, you know this about me .

An anger was unleashed upon Kristen, in an unfounded, unparalleled manner that in turn, compelled me. I had to do something. 

I Can Do~Helen Keller

How can I be an activist? Well… I learned that when I wrote things out, or spoke my rambling thoughts aloud, people listened and responded. One admirable trait about Captain Ignorant Casablanca at The Awful Truth: he will interact with those who send him questions, make provocative comments. I could give him a bit of credit in helping me find my voice. After wading through hundreds (hundreds!!) of anonymous or monikered commenters insulting Kristen’s hair follicles, smile [or lack of], shoes, fingernails and family members, I lamented with my girl Bouffant, and asked her how we can bring attention to and then curb (if not stop) the daily bashing on Awful.

My complaining resulted in a letter (pre-read by Bouffant in our first writing partnership) that I wrote to Mr Casablanca, asking him to reconsider the moderation of  his comment section, so as not to enable the hatred and bullying. . . and he wrote back. He asked me to help him brainstorm how to do this. While Ted Casablanca really didn’t implement suggestions I gave, he at least encouraged proactivity on my part. He reminded me that I have my own little pocket of power. Words can be incredibly powerful…And Lawdy knows I have them in abundance. 

Journals- Keeping Your Memory

Definition: Beautiful

~Urban Dictionary’s third most popular definition, June 2013

Beautiful, adjective. The description of anyone who is true to themselves.

“Honesty is beautiful.”

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Middle School Mixups

I brought together a small task group. My Team Other Captains were elected. Bouffant, Buff, CC and the always impressive Goldeneye began receiving emails from me with fragments of ideas and anecdotes about misfitting and combatting hatred…and questions on downloading images and links. I looked to CC to be my expert guide as she had launched KSIBTU to such exuberant welcome, I knew she could at least nudge my stumbling feet in the right direction.  I collected memories of my first few brushes with intolerance, unkindness…and rebellion. All in the name of  creating a forum for patience, positivity and Rebellious Beauty, but in an authentic, personal way. A small army of Kristen Stewart defenders, yes, but really, it evolved into a gathering of rebellious misfits needing to speak up for all under-voiced, misrepresented people.

For us OTHERS.

I found myself remembering my first experience of “media” and the havoc it wreaks. I briefly mentioned a few incidents on my About KJ Page. Since the faceless, nameless one-sided attacks upon Kristen reminded me a little of middle school drama, let me tell you a little story. 

Books fly with imaginations and dreams of the Mad Ones

I was thirteen years old and, like, totally with the love of my life, Joey. I had a unique look about me, I gathered that much, what with several complete strangers approaching me and commenting on my “exoticness”. I understood that I was somewhat surprising in my appearance compared to my family and peers as I’m a bi-racial girl, adopted by a family who had physical traits the polar opposite of mine.  I tried to blend in quietly, and I thought I was doing it well. Anyway, I was in 8th grade of junior high. Dreamy Joey and I. Together. He was, no exaggeration, the best looking boy in the school. During our entire passionate-for-junior-high school relationship, other girls, including my peers and upper classwomen (!!!) tried to drive a wedge between us, to lure Joey away from my frizzy-haired, book-loving self.

 

It was the end of the year, and I found myself very flatteringly nominated for several end-of-year yearbook categories: Best Personality, Nicest smile, and one half of the school’s Cutest Couple. Ah yes. Our coupledom was nominated as The Best. K-JO was IN. THE.HOUUUUSE.   

LOVE photo Lights

So listen up: I won all the categories for which I was nominated. However, an odd quandary at the yearbook printers led to a picture of my face floating below the title of CUTEST (equivalent of today’s SCHOOL HOTTIE) instead of BEST PERSONALITY (the title I really wanted) in the final, massively-distributed yearbook. I suddenly acquired the drive for self-preservation, for self defense.

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People would whisper and verbalize their warring opinions about my status as CUTEST in the school as I would make my way to my locker, my frizzy hair shoved into a scrunchy. Yeah, I said it: In junior high, I wore scrunchies. Girls would gather in catty, feral groups in the hallways and literally point and loudly, not accidentally, exclaim: “SHEEEEEE is the PRETTIEST GIRL IN THE SCHOOL?” And then they would, of course, reference lovely, beautiful, desirable Joey. “…HOW is that ugly mess JOEY’S GIRLFRIEND? What is she, anyway?” 

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Yeah. Those fucking trolls were ripping me apart physically, based on a misprint in the biggest media sensation for the time [we’re talking pre-Facebook, folks], and because I had attention on myself already, with my beautiful boyfriend, I deserved the hate, as deemed by society [middle school student body]. It didn’t matter that I was an Honor Student, an accomplished musician and a noted Peer Counselor. These vultures insulted my hair. My clothes. The shape of my eyes.  

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Sadly, as you can witness at any given moment on Twitter, not much has changed. In fact, it seems worse, what with the world wide web and the increase in anonymous bullying. Middle school politics are being played out on Twitter timelines [or DMs nowadays] and in comment sections [my CyberSisters call them ‘Carol Anne’s Closet’ –ahhh Poltergeist] at this very moment. And while there may be some younger folks participating in the spewage…It has been proven that the loudest squawkers and vocally vile Kristen-Haters fall within the average age bracket of 39 years old.  Grown-ass ‘adults’, mainly women, attacking the character and physical attributes of a-then eighteen year old girl.  This couldn’t be a case of Middle School Mixups. 

Molly was my First Featured Royal Rebel in a moment. And Kristen became my unquestioned Reigning Queen of Other.

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The recall of my traumatic brush with public opinion and media misrepresentation combined with a fond retelling of my encounters with My MOLLIESMusings On Other Queens, Kstew and Unconventional Beauty was born. Goldeneye helped me outline and shape my goals. Bouffant and CC pre-read the first drafts. Buff created the most beautiful background and banner for the site and for my Twitter account (also created June 3, 2010). And, well… Heeeeeeeeere’s, MOO. 

Remember when CC told me to push 'Publish', Remember???

Remember when CC told me to push ‘Publish’, Remember???

Definition: Other

~Merriam-Webster Dictionary, June 2013

Other, adjective. a: being the one (as of two or more) remaining or not included.

b: being the one or ones distinct from that or those first mentioned or implied.

c: not the samedifferent

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Definition: Unconventional

~The Synonym Finder, 1986 First Edition

Unconventional, adjective. Uncommon, rare, unique, peculiar, uncustomary, unexampled, unparalleled, unexpected. Extra-ordinary.

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The Heart Of The Matter

I had hoped to post this Birthday Edition MOO on Monday, June 3, the exact anniversary of its first publishing. Sleep deprivation and intense client work at The Magical Little Practice prompted me to wait a little longer . As it is, I feel very much so at peace with posting today, on Thursday, Musings’ regular posting day, and because the first essay ever also emerged on a Thursday.

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Also, just this Tuesday, we learned that Kristen booked two new film projects, both independent dramas, both reflective of Kristen’s essentialness. Her Otherness. Her Royalty.  Because truly, the heart of the matter is this: Kristen Stewart defines Beauty in her unapologetic defiance of anyone’s/everyone’s expectations, with her relentless insistence on protecting all (including whom) she deems precious, and in the thoughtful, measured choices she makes regarding her work, her self proclaimed love.

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With the announcements of her new projects, the extreme wayward focus of the past few weeks, months, years, can finally center on Kristen’s craft.. . and for me, we can honor the beginning. And like Kristen, we can return to our roots.

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Molly Ringwald reminded me that even awkward misfits can bring The Pretty Back. My Molly introduced me to Vegetarian Vampires and is proof that even typically collected & calm Cool Girls are susceptible to addiction to a wildly romantic notion.  The Awful Truth blessed me with a plethora of obscenely articulate, intelligent wordsmiths, all who encouraged me to speak up, find the words, because there are so many Others who want the change.  We Misfits, Unusuals, Unconventionals, and Defiant Ones don’t need or deserve ostracism because of our unique perspectives or philosophies. We deserve celebrations. Coronations, even. 

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A crown for my birthday celebration with the KSIBTU Crew

Today I pay homage to the sole reason for Musings’ conception: Identifying and exalting all the qualities that set us apart from anyone else. And one way to combat the destruction and exploitation of these unique abilities and assets…is to EMBRACE them. 

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Today is not the day for judgments, biased relationship advice, amateur psychological diagnoses, bids to become the “The Most Insidery”, or spectacularly dramatic paparazzi fanfiction. It is not the time for mass hysteria triggered by wild speculations from unproven informants. Today is for honoring our roots, honoring our Beauty Rebellion, and the Something we can DOAnd this day is for saluting a courageous woman for moving onward, always, despite the vast challenges and countless detractors.

A woman who embodies all the qualities of Unconventional Beauty…

Reigning Other Queen: Kristen Stewart

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Thank you, you beautiful Readers, Friends, Sisters, Brothers and OTHERS, for these extraordinary three years. It has been an absolute pleasure. You literally give me life. And Kristen? #OtherOn, your Highness. #OtherOn. 

Molly is Other.

Kristen is Other.

Others return to their roots.

Others do their Something.

Embrace Your Other.

***

Playlist

Hero ~ Family of the Year

Stubborn Love ~ The Lumineers

Blue Skies ~ Noah and the Whale

***

The Season for Perspective

16 Dec

Well, my Lovelies, it’s that wonderful time of year. Christmas, Hanukkah, NYEve and New Year’s Day…New resolutions, frenzied shopping and oh my goodness the sweet treats! The carols! The lights! The movies and music! The fudge. The old-school TV specials! (Did anybody else watch It’s A Yogi Christmas? ‘Heeeey, Boo Boo’, says Yogi Bear, not Rob via the Eclipse Commen-tree). **PSA ANNOUNCEMENT: This is the first of many, many references to Robert Thomas Pattinson I will make in this post. For those of you “fans” who write me to yell at and insult me for even alluding to Rob on what you think is  supposed to “only be a Kristen Blog”, you have been warned. Perhaps you might want to skip this post. Because I’m going to talk a lot about  Our Reigning Queen Kristen in addition to her professional and personal mate Robert, who is also a Featured Royal Rebel and Ambassador of Other.**

Well,  I’m typing with cold, stiff fingers today since N and I try to keep our utility bills low by running the heater only when necessary (blue lips, chattering teeth), but we’re blessed in that it rarely gets to that point. I won’t dare speak about “cold”, since as a Cali native and resident, I may not truly experience the cold that say, my friend Sav does in Ireland, or my mid-westie Sisters. They’ve IM’d or written emails this week indicating their thermometers say it’s -10 degrees F. I have no idea what that means. Seriously. This is what I’m hearing: “It’s cold, fuckers!!. I know this because my eye lashes froze, and my car handle broke off, and I have to shovel snow off the driveway…but my teeth are chattering too hard and our power went out…and..and…”

Ok, even FrozenStew trumps all. Recognize.

So I’ve been pleased that NinjaStew has managed to stay under the radar per her usual stealthy self. It isn’t about what we want for Kristen and Rob. It’d be lovely to glimpse her beautiful face again sure, but I’m much happier knowing that she is immersed in work and remaining out of the limelight because it’s what she prefers. And that’s what today’s essay will be about: Refocusing. Shifting lenses of perspective from which we view our surroundings, ourselves, Kristen and our fellow Others. While we may be hankering for a glimpse of our Reigning Other Queen and her Deliciously Handsome Poet Warrior, Kristen and Rob have both made it abundantly clear that they prefer to proceed through their daily existence with little to no attention paid to them. Of course, they acknowledge that they have extremely high profile professions, and there are public appearances and press junkets they are required to attend for the J-O-B (but oh how we appreciate how well they clean up). . .

But both Kristen and Rob, though Kristen more adamantly, express their hope of keeping their personal lives private, and separate from their work world. I think it’s good to be reminded of this about our Reigning Royalty. So how are we going to prompt ourselves to keep perspective?  I suggest we bring awareness back to basics and…oh, yes. LOVE. We’re gonna talk about LOVE today.

Why? you may ask. Well, for a few reasons. . .

1. I keep saying I’ll write about Love for Musings. Just trying to keep my promise.

2. It’s the holiday season, and it’s not uncommon to become overwhelmed with all the details: food, shopping, party-planning, work stats, obligations, bills, being nice to family  members you really despise, the influx of memories. And why  do we decide to gather, celebrate, sing, cry or passionately argue, laugh, and dance  at all? Oh yeah. LOVE.

3. It’s the end of another year in this nutty but passionately colorful fandom. While there are several subsets and sub-subsets of support for Twilight, Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson, what is the common denominator of it all? LOVE. See, whether its love of the original Twilight books and the spin off into the outrageously addictive Twi Fan Fiction; or whether we’re drawn to the movies and therefore the actors portraying young protagonists navigating timeless and somewhat obsessive and  passionate feelings for one another…it’s L-O-V-E.

4. We need the reminder of what it’s about every now and again. That perspective shake up I talked about earlier, we need it. We forget it. Even though it’s all around us.

:::CASE IN POINT:::

This week, a picture was–regardless if by accident or not–released online featuring our Royal Rebels Kristen and Robert posing in front of a Christmas tree with Rob’s parents in what appears to be the living room with a European-style layout and design. Rob, with a mane that rivaled a Serengeti lion’s, had one arm around his mother and another arm wrapped around Kristen with her shorter, black bob, their fingers interlaced on her shoulder. The picture is clearly from last year. The picture clearly intimates several loving factors:

a. It simply solidifies and confirms the Paris hand-holding pics that had been scooped the previous month, Nov ’09. They are continuing to display their affection for and with each other.

b. It was a year ago. Friends, from my observations over the past two years, Kristen and Rob have given every indicator that they’ve been close and quite fond of one another for so much longer than people really understand. And yet. . .there are still folks who doubt they are an authentic relationship. #Nonsensicals

c. Rob’s parents were in the picture with them. At Christmas time. Who do you spend your big holidays with? Your family. Whether by blood or by bonds of friendship that are just as potent as blood, holiday gatherings are amongst family. To me, this picture indicates that Rob and his parents consider Kristen, apart of their family.

It was a lovely picture, but I did not post or retweet it because I felt that it was clearly a private moment not meant to be seen (consumed, shredded) by the public. But even in the minute of looking it over, I could identify the tell tale signs that Kristen and Rob (and his parents) were both so very happy.

Then my feelings of foreboding and sadness flooded in because I don’t think the Pattinson Family’s private photos should be open to fodder and dissection, nor Kristen or Robert’s personal lives. And then the drama unleashed. High profile “fans”/”shippers” in the Twi-fandom began publicly bashing and shaming other fans for enjoying “the private” photo too much, all while claiming that they’ve possessed it for many months prior, this private family photo mind you; and, the division between “Insiders” and “just regular fans” was ripped farther apart (because didn’t you know that there is a hierarchy of fans in this community? *inserts sarcasm*). Websites/blogs were publishing the photo so fast that before you could say, “Twilight Saga, Breaking Dawn” (and let’s face it, that’s a mouthful too, but whatev), the tweets grew to the tens of thousands. The tweets posted were  public arguments about who had the right to publish which photos and when….annnnd the insults were traded, and standoffs were initiated, “judgements” handed down. Uh, WTF JUST HAPPENED??  Where did the semblance of perspective disappear to? Did Rob and Kristen really trigger a Twitter War with a Christmas photo?? So the focus was lost, the perspective had shifted so far away from the original idea of supporting a couple of awkwardly charming, shy and gifted artists who loved their craft and have love for one another.

Rob to Kris: Maybe if we stand here really quiet and still, the masses will run right past us and not notice. Kris: Good plan.

Suddenly it wasn’t about the love anymore. Overlooked in the petty fighting was the message depicted by that private picture: The family love. The loving relationship that Kristen and Rob more visibly share. The love of love which brought many of us into this fandom in the very beginning, years ago. Suddenly, it was like the Twi Fandom and Twitter had begun enacting the battleground  strategy that propelled the plot for Eclipse: Who can wrestle control of as many “red dots”  (followers, fans) as possible? Who is faster at posting an exclusive photo? Who has the most followers on Twitter (because that number indicates almighty TRUTH of a person’s status and level of integrity amongst the fans, right?)?? Whom is entrusted with “insider” information? Nope. I’m not hearing anything about the privacy and protection of Kristen and Rob or their families in these fights, except maybe to further their own agenda.

:::A SHIFT IN PARADIGM:::

There are a few ways we can help out our Fellow Majestic Misfits and balance out the focus, and return to the basics.

1. Honor the request for personal privacy; Focus on the work. Ok, so you all know obviously, that I support Kristen and Rob  (separately and together). I am concerned by the shift that some of the better known “shippers” in the community have undergone in the past year. It feels that the focus has drifted and it’s no longer about simply celebrating the careers and personal happiness of two artists who are intelligent, unconventional (i.e. OTHER), and refreshing. So if it’s not about which online community is most popular or the most inside, then the interest swings towards their personal, private lives.  Is it any wonder that Rob and Kristen have to put on their armor whenever they step outside their work or homes?

There is such joy in listening to the Eclipse commentary (or, “Commen-tree”, says Rob) these past weeks. But in the very beginning of it all, in the great Twilight audio commen-tree, Kristen told Catherine Hardwicke #TeamChattyCathy and Rob that when she would do her on-set schoolwork (since she was a minor, under 18 at the time Twilight began filming) in classrooms at the school that served as Forks High School, people (the school’s actual students?) would constantly knock on the port hole, the small window in the door, when she was  trying to complete her work. She effectively described it as feeling “like a monkey in a cage”. How much do you want to bet that the feeling [like an animal on display] has increased tenfold for Kristen? Colleagues and friends of our Queen Kristen and her equally Rebellious Consort Rob never comment to the press with their editorial on Rob and Kristen’s personal relationship, but rather, draw praise and accolades for their professional successes.

Kristen’s On The Road costars Garrett Hedlund (yum) and Amy Adams (another lovely ginger with immense talent) both had wonderfully kind compliments for Kristen:

“Kristen is incredible. And in this, everyone will see how hard a worker she is, and the devotion she puts into her work. Her performance [in On The Road] is going to be exposed highly” ~ Garret Hedlund

Amy Adams says:

“[Kristen] is awesome. I’d seen her since she was in Panic Room, and knew she was fantastic…Thought she was wonderful in Into the Wild. The girl’s got some chops! And on top of that, she is just really sweet.”

OHai, beautiful StrawberryStew!

And Robert’s new movie Water for Elephants is earning favorable and promising reactions to the just-released trailer for the film. *TAKES A DEEP BREATH* Dude. The trailer for WFE is unbelievable. It’s gorgeous and feels epic. Sit down for a minute and give yourself a gift of the WFE Trailer… HERE>>>>WATER FOR ELEPHANTS TRAILER . His costars, both Oscar-Winning actors, Christoph Waltz and Reese Witherspoon offer commendatory reviews of Rob’s performance as well as his personal character.

Christoph says:

“You’re going to see Rob in a whole new way, a good way. It wouldn’t surprise me at all if he were to receive an Oscar nod for this role.”

Reese says:

“He [Rob] is a very sweet, kind man with the nicest family. He worked very hard on this movie and looks great in it too. He’s going through such a weird  life experience right now, but handling it so beautifully, and with such grace.”

2. Remember that we are ALL Other together. This is where I’m gonna drop the L Word (also an excellent though now completed TV show) again on you, my friends. Another thing we all have in common, aside from our ravishingly unique inner and outer beauty, is that we have one, two, maybe twenty  or more people we care about. I encourage us all to remember what it is like to love someone: A spouse, partner, friends, roommates, boyfriends, girlfriends, siblings, cousins, nieces and nephews, etc…. I personally would throw myself in front of a bus if it meant saving my beloved Monkey niece from feeling pain. You parental units out there know exactly the level of sacrifice you would make for the LOVE of your child. Is it too far-fetched to think you might want to protect your loved ones from physical plus verbal and emotional stressors? Is it too ungainly to believe that Kristen and Robert feel this passionate protectiveness over their own hearts and physical well-being, in addition to each others’?

3. Bring it back to YOU. As always, I remind myself and my fellow Misfits to find the courage to look in the mirror, to ask myself what I can control and contribute in this fandom and in my 3D life. I can’t control how others behave publicly and in their personal lives, but I can do something about how I am representing for Otherness. If I am reacting passionately and emotionally to something happening in the Cyber World, or in the Twi Fandom, I stop myself and wonder, “What is this? What is happening in my life right now that is effecting how I view this situation?” And with a little quiet time,  withdrawal from being online or engrossed in a project, I find my answers. My own relationship, my own job, my family, my financial matters or my pathway to Bliss have been neglected.

While this Kristen & Rob Christmas Picture drama erupted in the online fandom the other night, I removed myself from any debates and checked my emails. It turns out I had received an email from a work colleague from a counseling agency I used to work with a few years ago, back in my home town. I learned, to my great shock, that another former coworker of mine was in a horrific car accident a couple days ago and she is in critical care at a hospital. Her husband, her love, a man I believe was her soul mate, was killed. He was only a couple years older than I, in his early to mid-thirties and desperately in love with my friend who is now a young widow. The whole of my former agency is devastated. They had been married only three years.

Yesterday, my good friend called, appropriately so, @TrueLove was laid off from a prestigious legal position that she’s held for many years. A week before Christmas. She’s a mother and a wife and a skilled professional and she, like millions of us, are unemployed.

My husband N and I are  preparing for our second interview with U.S. Immigration to review N’s status as a permanent resident here in the U.S. (Note: See the movie Green Card  for immigration shenanigans!)  I was going to tell you all our story, it’s pretty incredible, but perhaps I’ll give the details another time. I’ve spoken a lot this essay. But I can say that N and I have experienced challenges of scrutiny, naysayers and great concern because of the way we met, and how we “courted” and the exotic ways we tried to fight to keep a relationship alive when we were never on the same continent together. We’ve been married for over 2 years now, and we’re still under the magnifying glass because N comes from a country that is placed on  the “Red Flag” list.  (i.e. threat of terrorism due to Religious affiliation).

So seriously. There are enough real-life, unbelievably profound events occurring as we speak. Does a Twitter popularity contest or the curiosity about the personal lives of two young artists –who don’t want the attention anyway–take precedence over life, death, family, unemployment and immigration issues?

PERSPECTIVE.

So the picture above, of the beautiful afterglow? That was taken by N. He is an extraordinarily gifted photographer, today taking a leap in following his own bliss. *If you’re interested in seeing more of N’s photos, contact KinoPhotography@gmail.com. He’ll link you to his gallery that we’re in process of setting up*. We didn’t even know he was so gifted in photography until he came here to The States almost 3 years ago, and began playing around with my point-and-shoot digital camera. So here we are, encouraging each other to follow our Bliss.

It is here that I’d normally move on to introduce the Featured Rebel Royal for the week. But I think the two Majestic Misfits we’ve discussed today already beautifully illustrate my Musings on the good practice of keeping perspective…and LOVE. I’ll happily give them free reign of Musings this week. *cheesy grin*.

REIGNING OTHER QUEEN: KRISTEN STEWART

“Unless you respect and like yourself, nobody else is going to”

ROBERT IS OTHER.

KRISTEN IS OTHER.

OTHERS DO NOT LOSE SIGHT OF THE LARGER PERSPECTIVE.

EMBRACE YOUR OTHER.

 

QUESTION: How do you prompt yourself back to YOU in order to maintain perspective?

A/N: I have updated the Sentence Completion Activity in the ABOUT KJ section…check it and leave some of your own answers if you feel inspired to do so! For next week, I will post a Holiday Edition of Musings with a new Giveaway that will have very much to do with PERSPECTIVE and The Pursuit of BLISS (pssst, check N’s photography). We’ll talk holiday traditions, and a Kristen Stewart 2010 Retrospective…

CC over at KSIBTU is asking you to send in pics of how you and your city shows Holiday Spirit (and how of course, Kristen is far superior to all-KSIBTU after all). Send yours into her! Here are mine that I’m sending… See you next week, Lovelies!! Always, KJ

This beautiful wooden, painted train is carrying large, colorfully wrapped presents. It is beneath a ginormous, decorated Pine tree placed on the center divider of a major street. Can you see the traveling Other Tiara?

T-Rex can be found among the giant Snow Flakes of the Science Museum

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